Because My Daughter Grew Up With Horses ©
While watching my daughter ride today, I took time to reflect on the young woman my daughter had become and the choices she would face in the future. As I looked at her I could see the athlete she was, and the determined woman she would soon be.
I started
thinking about some the girls we knew in our town who were already pregnant,
pierced in several places, hair every color under the sun, drop outs, drug
addicts and on the fast track to nowhere, seeking surface identities because
they had no inner self esteem. The parents of these same girls have asked me
why I “waste” the money on horses so my daughter can ride. I’m told she will
grow out of it, lose interest, discover boys and all kinds of things that try
to pin the current generation’s “slacker” label on my child. I don’t think it
will happen, I think she will love and have horses all her life.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she has compassion. She knows that we must take
special care of the very young and the very old. We must make sure those
without voices to speak of their pain are still cared for.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she learned responsibility for others than herself.
She learned that regardless of the weather you must still care for those you
have the stewardship of. There are no “days off” just because you don’t feel
like being a horse owner that day. She learned that for every hour of fun you
have there are days of hard slogging work you must do first.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she learned not to be afraid of getting dirty and that appearances don’t matter
to most of the breathing things in the world we live in.
Horses do not care about designer clothes, jewelry, pretty hairdos or anything
else we put on our bodies to try to impress others. What a horse cares about
are your abilities to work within his natural world, he doesn’t care if you’re
wearing $80.00 jeans while you do it.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she learned about sex and how it can both enrich and complicate lives.
She learned that it only takes one time to produce a baby, and the only way to
ensure babies aren’t produced is not to breed. She learned how babies are
planned, made, born and, sadly, sometimes die before reaching their potential.
She learned how sleepless nights and trying to outsmart a crafty old broodmare
could result in getting to see, as non-horse owning people rarely do, the birth
of a true miracle.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she understands the value of money. Every dollar
can be translated into bales of hay, bags of feed or farrier visits. Purchasing
non-necessities during lean times can mean the difference between feed and good
care, or neglect and starvation. She has learned to judge the level of her care
against the care she sees provided by others and to make sure her standards
never lower, and only increase as her knowledge grows.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she has learned to learn on her own. She has had
teachers that cannot speak, nor write, nor communicate beyond body language and
reactions. She has had to learn to “read” her surroundings for both safe and
unsafe objects, to look for hazards where others might only see a pretty
meadow. She has learned to judge people as she judges horses. She looks beyond
appearances and trappings to see what is within.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she has learned sportsmanship to a high degree.
Everyone that competes fairly is a winner. Trophies and ribbons may prove someone
a winner, but they do not prove someone is a horseman. She has also learned
that some people will do anything to win, regardless of who it hurts. She knows
that those who will cheat in the show ring will also cheat in every other
aspect of their life and are not to be trusted.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she has self-esteem and an engaging personality.
She can talk to anyone she meets with confidence, because she has to express
herself to her horse with more than words. She knows the satisfaction of
controlling and teaching a 1000 pound animal that will yield willingly to her
gentle touch and ignore the more forceful and inept handling of those stronger
than she is. She holds herself with poise and professionalism in the company of
those far older than herself.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she has learned to plan ahead. She knows
that choices made today can effect what happens five years down the road. She
knows that you cannot care for and protect your investments without savings to
fall back on. She knows the value of land and buildings. And that caring for
your vehicle can mean the difference between easy travel or being stranded on
the side of the road with a four horse trailer on a hot day.
Because my daughter grew up with horses
she has learned that color, sex, and age do not establish a horse’s, or a
person’s, intelligence, ability or value. She
has learned that only personal actions can tell you the merit of each
individual, all other labels are put on things because of snobbery or fear by
narrow minded people. A good horse has no set color, or age, or sex, neither
does a good person.
When I look
at what she has learned and what it will help her become, I can honestly say
that I haven’t “wasted” a penny on providing her with horses. I only wish that
all children had the same opportunities to learn these lessons from horses
before setting out on the road to adulthood.
Written and copyrighted January 21, 2008
U.S. Library of Congress #TX0007159977
By Tracy Meisenbach
Brookneal VA
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